Reconciliation

Matthew 5 : 20 - 26

....first be reconciled.....then come and offer your gift....

Anger is a six letter word describing an emotion that Christians often do not know how to deal with. We know that harboring anger is spiritually and emotionally and even physically (contributing to stomach ulcers for example) unhealthy. But what should we do?

It falls back to self-knowledge. Anger is a protective emotion that keeps us in control when things threaten to shake our world. It is useful as a temporary measure but needs to be processed (acknowledged and released) before it takes root in our hearts. I have always tried to remember the "anger iceberg" we learnt about in counselling. And these days when anger makes an appearance, I ask myself what is really going on inside. It is often one of the more tender feelings, that leaves me feeling vulnerable. So, with greater courage I bring to prayer what is really brewing within. Often this helps the prayer become more 'real' as I present myself as I am to the Lord. It is easier to distance oneself by praying 'about' rather than praying 'with' these feelings but the relationship with God suffers. There are also times when it is appropriate to express inner feelings, what is going on within, especially when anger arises at loved ones. I've found that being real, being honest does help, especially with growing teen children.

"May I be no man's enemy, and may I be the friend of that which is eternal and abides. May I never quarrel with those nearest me: and if I do, may I be reconciled quickly. May I love, seek and attain only that which is good. May I wish for all men's happiness and envy none. May I never rejoice in the ill fortune of one who has wronged me. When I have done or said what is wrong, may I never wait for the rebuke of others, but always rebuke myself until I make amends. May I win no victory that harms either me or my opponent. May I reconcile friends who are angry with one another. May I never fail a friend who is in danger. When visiting those in grief may I be able by gentle and healing words to soften their pain. May I respect myself. May I always keep tame that which rages within me. May I accustom myself to be gentle and never be angry with people because of circumstances. May I never discuss who is wicked and what wicked things he has done, but know good men and follow in their footsteps."

(Eusebius, 3rd century church father)