Affirmation

I've been watching Oprah from time to time and yesterday I caught an episode on mid-life. The guest was a medical doctor who gave women advice on how to weather pre-menopause and menopause healthily. Sound advice on how to eat well, to relax and take care of the self and how emotions affect physical well being. Fairly good 'preventive medicine' as Oprah noted.

What struck me, though, was the generous affirmations (e.g. "I think you are really beautiful") given by the doctor to a lady in the audience she spoke with. She actually affirmed them just for being themselves - not for what they tried to achieve (although they were all people who 'worked hard' at life; well, maybe trying too hard). As Christians we are in an even better position to offer genuine affirmations to each other. I wish we did. I wish we were less afraid of 'puffing up', of causing pride to creep in. The converse is true. The secular world has caught on. People who are told their ultimate worth - as Christians, we know this means in God's eyes - do take more care of themselves, do not 'abuse' their bodies and minds by compulsive eating, overwork or emotional stress. Perhaps we should speak God's affirmations, genuinely of course, to each other. Is it Asian culture that shys away from this? Do we feel uncomfortable because generally we have not heard this 'love language'?

But we do need others, in the flesh, to remind us that we are the beloved; that God is well pleased with us. I am sure there are many people, besides our closest family members, that we could affirm at appropriate moments. Just for who they are. Just for being themselves, light and shadow. We ought to remember that the secular world has caught on that people 'thrive' when spoken to in this manner. We sometimes focus so much on judgment that we fail to speak words of life, that make it easier for people to accept their fallenness, their lostness and to accept the good news of the gospel.