Grace of seniors

A long delayed visit to my aunt in hospital. She has been there for over a month and I had seen her once before. Her condition has deteriorated - and she is most of the time in confusion. Able to recognize people, but then other connections are fragile and lost. It was not comfortable for me, as I was early and my uncle had not arrived, as he usually does with lunch for her. I tried coaxing her to have breakfast but in her confusion, she vehemently refused. In the end, i decided the best thing would be to sit down and read the newspapers, just being there, rather than provoking more confusion by trying to sort out her tangential statements. This actually helped because she didn't feel so defensive about people 'forcing' her to eat...

After a while - grace led me, I am sure - I spotted a jar of cream on her bedside table. I reached for it and asked if I could apply it on her hands and arms. To my surprise and relief, she accepted with no resistance at all and I spent some time applying the cream. Perhaps the power of touch speaks more, much more than verbal persuasions.

Soon my uncle arrived with lunch. It was heart warming to see the trouble he had taken to get some nutritious porridge and beverage for her, all ready in flasks. He poured out some porridge but was so disappointed when she refused. I could feel his concern and frustration - I was witnessing the daily routine that's been going on for a while now. He is in his early eighties - and spends many hours at the hospital these days. He knows that with metastatic cancer, she does not have very long.

I find that by observing those in their senior years - I learn many life lessons. Someone in her seventies shared with me just the other day about her experience that "my life is not my own now" (after a series of illnesses, from which she recovered). How true for all of us, each one, at every age. But it is often the seniors who, when graced by God are able to embrace that experience, not just talk about it.