Hardness of heart

Matthew 19 : 3 - 12

"Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?" Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning"

So much of the suffering we face is the consequence of living in a fallen world. God's original plan for his creatures has been marred by sin. Yet, we can rejoice because his work of redemption has begun - the kingdom is here. This is the reign of God inaugurated by Jesus Christ .....often hidden in our midst, yet very real for those who have eyes to see and ears to hear. But - and it is an important 'but' - there is still much hardness of heart among humankind. This manifests itself most painfully in terms of broken relationships.

The Pharisees who question Jesus are interested in keeping on the right side of the Law. The letter of the Law matters to them and they measure everything by external compliance. For Jesus, the root of the issue is quite different. He brings them (and us) back to God's original plan for husband and wife, a plan that involves loving and committed union.The Pharisees wanted to know how one can get out of a marriage, while still remaining within the Law. Jesus had to tell them bluntly that the exceptions were made simply because of humankind's hardness of heart. Divorce is not an 'option' and yet there are circumstances where it is the lesser of two evils and is therefore permitted, with much sadness in God's heart.

Divorce is a topic that remains a controversial issue among Christians. Some pride themselves for taking an 'orthodox' stand, others are labelled too 'liberal' and still others would try to go on a case to case basis. Many books and papers have been written to defend different viewpoints, all claiming to be biblical.

As I read this passage, I am struck by the reminder that it is humankind's 'hardness of heart' that is the core issue. Divorce is the final outcome of a process whereby one or both parties have hardened their hearts towards the other. God never meant it to be that way. However, before we start to judge others for their marital breakdown, let us look honestly at our own relationships. Married couples may stay on together even when their relationship is no longer supported by deeply loving and committed union. It may be easy to remain married in name, yet not be willing to extend sacrificial love towards our spouses. Before we 'throw the first stone', we ought to examine ourselves and deal with any 'hardness of heart' towards our own loved ones.