Do you now believe?

John 16: 29 - 33
"Do you now believe? A time is coming when you will be scattered....

You will leave me all alone....Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me"

The disciples believe that at last they have grasped the mystery of Jesus. They think that they have already understood what Jesus is saying to them. Yet, in reality, Jesus knows the level of their understanding. Isn't this all too true for us ? We study Scripture and if we are gifted with intelligence, we find an easy grasp of the subject. Too easy, sometimes. For it may just be head knowledge, not having moved to heart knowledge and experiential knowledge. Jesus knows that the disciples' understanding is still in process......in spite of their newly acquired insight, these very disciples will abandon him when they face persecution.
The question "Do you now believe?" is addressed to me. I read much and I read fast. This is like eating a meal too fast, just stuffing in food or knowledge as the case may be, without savoring or allowing it to nourish every part of my being. For my time away, I was tempted to bring along several books. I managed to reduce it to one, apart from the Bible. I am here to be attentive to God's presence in and around me. His presence is a better teacher than any book. My believing must not be based on factual knowledge alone. My believing grows strong and true as I experience the Lord, as I listen to his voice giving 'reality' to what I have read. This is a slow process. Impatience will cause me to regress. Grasping for more will lead to greater poverty of spirit. Lord, I do believe, help my unbelief.