Friday, March 23, 2007

Who is God? Who am I? What am I to do with my life?

Gospel of John, Chapter 7
"..even his own brothers did not believe in him. Some said 'He is a good man'. Others replied, 'No, he deceives the people'. The Jews were amazed..'How did this man get such learning without having studied?' 'You are demon possessed,' the crowd answered. 'Isn't this the man they are trying to kill?' ...'we know where this man is from..' Still, many in the crowd put their faith in him. 'Surely this man is the Prophet.' Others said, 'He is the Christ'. 'No one ever spoke the way this man does.'
It is fascinating to note how many different reactions to Jesus emerge during the celebration of the Feast of Tabernacles. Verse 43 sums it up: 'Thus the people were divided because of Jesus.'
So many voices that claim to know who Jesus is. Yet what is his own answer to all this? Does he get confused and try to answer all of them to gain their approval?
"My teaching is not my own. It comes from Him who sent me. He who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth; there is nothing false about him. I am from Him and He sent me"
Jesus is who he is because of the One who sent him. He does and is nothing more and nothing less. The title of this post has 3 key questions for the spiritual life: Who is God? Who am I? What am I to do with my life? These are fundamental questions suggested by Anderson and Reese in their book 'Spiritual Mentoring'. We cannot know what we are to do before we develop a loving relationship with God and allow him to speak into our lives. He tells us 'who we are' Until we know who we are we will not be able to find and live our vocation authentically.
At certain points in my own life, I have felt frazzled by the many roles that I have to play...wife, mother, doctor, spiritual friend, active church member and so on. When I begin to focus firstly on the roles and the doing, I become confused because there are so many voices out there telling me how I should play all those roles. And telling me how I can earn affirmation or incur rejection. As I begin to get caught up with those demanding voices, I begin to live a very false self, and the many roles leave me weary. And then I realize that I have to take a couple of steps back and ask 'Who is God? Who am I?' What is my relationship with God like? Can I hear what he says to me? Do I take the trouble to be still and quiet enough to hear that Voice above all voices?
Jesus had many 'roles' too, in the different situations he faced. Yet it did not bother him. For Jesus did hear that Voice...first at his baptism..."You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased." Then at the Transfiguration and also most surely during the many nights he spent alone in prayer. Therefore at this point in his life, despite the rejections and confusion of those around him, he was not distracted. He knew who he came from and therefore he knew where he was going.
As I seek to be and become the beloved....I must first spend time with Jesus, beloved Son and hear again and again that gentle Voice within.

2 comments:

Alex Tang said...

Three very important questions we must ask ourselves. Daily if necessary.

lilian koh said...

Yes, actually I didn't think of it before but perhaps these could be questions for the daily "examen".