A shared journey

At our group today, we were nourished by bread broken and shared. We listened as our friend shared the spiritual journey she has been on since her niece's diagnosis with a rare cancer in February to her death three weeks ago. We have shared in this journey, even though not knowing the young girl personally, nor meeting her (she lived in NZ). We were a part by praying for the family. We were part of the larger community of faith, especially in the spiritual realm.

Many questions are raised when God does not 'answer' as we had hoped and prayed. Why did he not heal physically, even though there were early signs that things were progressing well? What about the many 'promises' from the Word, that the family heard?

Through it all, my friend kept us up to date about the situation. Through it all, I had the strong sense that God was very 'present' in the midst of the family, friends and all who interceded. And yet, my own struggle is with the fact that God's presence need not equate with the 'action' we hoped for, that is to heal. His presence can be ever so real and yet, we have to accept that his thoughts and his ways are not ours to understand. At the end of an article on spirituality I read a few days ago was this question: "Is God enough?" It would be dishonest to answer too quickly in the affirmative - for there are many things in this world that humanly, we would want, in addition to our God.

As one of the others shared today, when such seemingly unnecessary (she died at the age of eighteen) losses occur, it turns our image of God upside down. We often think we 'know' God when we really don't at all. Such times lead to growth when we allow our assumptions to be broken open by God himself. If we cling to pious platitudes about him we fool ourselves and lose the chance to a more mature faith. If we allow ourselves to confront our 'idols' of who he is, we open ourselves to the possibility of seeing him that bit clearer. We will of course never 'know' God fully while on this earth. But maybe from time to time, at graced moments, we can echo to some degree the words of Job, that "my ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you".