Following means leaving

Matthew 8 : 18 - 22

...I will follow you.....

It does seem that Jesus is not such a comfortable friend/teacher to follow after all. After a while, those who came near to him during his time on earth found out. And after a while those of us who contemplate him in the gospels also begin to feel uncomfortable. He is not just a 'good time' friend.

Many of us might wonder why Jesus seemed so discouraging when the disciple just asked to take care of his father until his death. Isn't that part of honoring parents as found in the ten commandments? Do disciples really need to have nowhere to call home, if we want to truly follow Jesus? All these questions make this passage a difficult one if read literally. And all sorts of explanations are given about what it means for "the dead to bury their own dead".

I think the most telling thing would be to place ourselves as the scribe or the disciple: what would we want to say to this enigmatic teacher, who attracts the crowds, who teaches with authority and who cares so compassionately for the needy?

"Lord, I will follow you wherever you lead me".......came to me as I prayed over the passage. At the same time, I know that there are many hurdles before such a desire is realized. I could not 'achieve' it myself in my weakness. I have to remember that this desire is first of all the Lord's desire for me too, and allow him to lead the way.

At my stage of life, at mid-life (and beyond) the 'leaving' in order to 'follow' takes a different turn. It may not be leaving the worldly goods that we need to do early on in the journey. (Most of us who have been Christians a long time have overcome many of these attachments) Now it may probably be a more subtle 'leaving' of the self motivated desire to 'do things for God' in order to allow the Lord to lead instead. Scary. Deeper areas are being transformed. Following means leaving, at each stage a different sort, but still a leaving behind.........of self will.